Sometimes you’ll run into a problem that’s simply out of your control. It can be easy to think, “This isn’t fair..” or “I shouldn’t have this problem..” That kind of mindset only prolongs the pain and the problem. Instead of focusing on your negative emotions, practice radical acceptance in the present moment.
Example: you are in horrible traffic on your way home from work. Instead of becoming belligerent about the situation you are literally stuck in, focus on how you can enjoy this very moment for what it is. Do you listen to a long but intellectual podcast? Do you call someone you haven’t spoken with in a while? Spin the negative situation into a positive and you’ll practice radical acceptance for what it is.
Pain on its own can be difficult. But it’s only when you don’t accept it that it turns into suffering.
Practicing non-attachment does not mean not feeling your emotions. Rather, it refers to an intention of not allowing your pain to turn into suffering.
“Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
Radical acceptance refers to a healthier way of thinking during already stressful situations. Instead of focusing on how you’d like something / someone to be different, recognize and accept the situation as it is right now. Remember: accepting is not the same as liking or condoning it.
When a person utilizes denial or another defense mechanism, they often end up feeling worse and in more distress because they’re not accepting the reality of the situation. Radical acceptance is a tool to help you see the present moment for what it is and look at it more objectively, rather than purely emotionally.
