Category: Couples Therapy

Couples Therapy with Chana Pfeifer, LCSW

Sometimes it can be difficult to get your spouse to talk about the issues you’re both experiencing. It’s important to remember that it might not be a matter of them not wanting to talk about things, but rather them not knowing exactly how to talk about them. This is where couples therapy with Chana Pfeifer, LCSW might come in handy!

Chana’s couples’ therapy is based on Imago Relationship Therapy, created by Harville Hendrix & Helen LaKelly Hunt.

Physical intimacy in a relationship is important for couples. Holding hands, massaging each other, cuddling during a movie, etc. keeps your bond together. It’s not just about sex. It’s about connecting physically and emotionally.

Not only can affectionate touch promote feelings of bonding and attachment in couples, but in long-term relationships, it also contributes to overall physical health and well-being.

Chana Pfeifer will help each partner make clear what he or she needs, so the partner can feel safe to give it. She assists couples in difficult times come into safety and connection. She helps partners be heard. She helps couples work through conflict and anger to create an environment of “getting my world”.

For more info. on counseling, call (516) 592-1107 or email Chana Pfeifer at TheHappierMe.LCSW@gmail.com

Reconnect in 2020

Reconnect in 2020 Couples Check-In Workshop

Class lead by Chana Pfeifer, LCSW & Imago Relationship Therapist

Thursday, January 30, 2020, 6 PM

ANOZ Spa Boutique
281 Nassau Blvd. Garden City South, NY 11530

Marriage Counseling WorkshopGet ready for a healthier relationship in 2020.

Attend this couples’ class on mastering connecting the modern way.

Awareness and communication are what makes a relationship work.

This couples workshop gives you tips for a connected relationship:

* Through Touch
* Appreciation
* Eye Contact
* Respect and much more!

Reserve your spot today.

$99.00 per couple. Refreshments included.

* Space is limited.

Sponsored by ANOZ Life Events.

Counseling for couples & individual adults in a safe, supportive place.

In today’s day and age, more and more couples are opting for counseling so that they can ensure they and their partner are on the same page when it comes to what they expect from their relationship.

Also, it is easier for couples to talk about difficult issues in a safe environment where they are guided by a professional, as it helps them look at each other in a new light, with a new perspective.

For people who have concerns about their upcoming marriage, or want to increase compatibility with their partner, attending this couples workshop with Chana Pfeifer can be a very rewarding experience.

For more info. on counseling, call (516) 592-1107 or email Chana Pfeifer at TheHappierMe.LCSW@gmail.com.

Divorce Counseling Long Island

Chana Pfeifer, LCSW – Divorce Counseling Long Island, NY

The termination of a marriage can be a process charged with many emotions, and often these feelings seem overwhelming.

Throughout the initiation, proceedings, and aftermath of a divorce, it is helpful to have a judgement free space in which you can communicate your feelings and better understand those of others involved. Whether the decision has been made due to discord within the relationship, infidelity, financial difficulties, abuse, addiction, or other factors, a solution-based divorce counselor can be your balance in a time of chaos.

Some of the anxieties of divorce can cause a wide range of issues, both internally and inter-personally.

Emotional, psychological, and even physical health issues are common reactions to such a monumental life change. Unhealthy coping mechanisms can arise due to the stress and emotional pain of divorce, often leading to increased aggression between parties and acceleration of self-destructive behaviors. When enduring such a dramatic phase change, personal priorities and future plans can become difficult to envision.

During and after the process, both children and adults face the challenges of balancing multiple facets of health whilst in a delicate state.

If children are involved, they may feel additional stress due to the parents’ personal and emotional biases without having anyone outside the family with whom to communicate their concerns. Allowing children to freely express their emotions in a neutral environment can facilitate their adjustment significantly.

Employing the help of a divorce counselor can make the transition more navigable in all aspects of one’s health and success. A counselor can help explain how to overcome emotions such as anger, grief, depression, and insecurity during and after the divorce process.

Unbiased mediation of conflict between spouses is quintessential to healthy progress.

This includes helping you and your former spouse accommodate differing points of view in a way that is mutually beneficial. Through counseling, it is possible to develop a cooperative relationship based on healthy communication.

While you are dealing with the internal stresses that result from divorce, a counselor can help you develop healthy defense mechanisms to protect yourself from undue pain and stress, while strengthening yourself by promoting healthy acclimation to a new future. Communicating in a safe, non-judgmental environment can fortify the health of the entire family. The advice of a counselor can help you face current difficulties and the future with certainty, confidence, and peace.

For additional information, call (516) 592-1107 or email Chana Pfeifer at TheHappierMe.LCSW@gmail.com.

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Pre-Marital Counseling West Hempstead, NY

As you prepare for your wedding, have you also prepared for your marriage?

A survey published by the Journal of Family Psychology reported that couples who underwent pre-marital education reported higher levels of marital satisfaction. They also noted a 30% decrease in the likelihood of divorce happening in over five years of the study.

Pre-Marital Counseling West Hempstead, NY

Chana Pfeifer, LCSW * The Happier MeEssentially, pre-marital counseling is a specialized type of therapy that prepares couples for marriage. The main goal is to help couples build a healthy, strong relationship that establishes a healthy foundation for their union.

Here is how an accredited counselor can help couples build a solid foundation for their union:

1.   Change Perspective

A counselor’s role is to help each partner evaluate the relationship in a more objective manner. They learn how to recognize their interactions and regard each other in a positive light.

2.   Identify Strengths

Pre-marital counseling helps couples identify their strengths in the relationship as a partnership. An in-depth understanding of the stronger aspects of the relationship helps build a spirit of resilience. Ultimately, couples will know that a solid foundation is what builds the marriage.

3.   Improve Communication

For a relationship to be successful, effective communication is an important factor to consider. Pre-marital counselors guide couples on how to talk to each other and remain intimate by openly expressing thoughts and feelings in a supportive way.

4.   Eliminate Dysfunctional Behaviors

Pre-marital counseling helps couples rectify dysfunctional behaviors such as dominance, control and addiction.

5.   Cultural Issues Affecting Marriage

Cultural beliefs tend to affect how partners relate to each other in their lives. It influences the daily common behaviors such as eating, working, and managing their money. The sooner a couple identifies and cultivates a new culture for themselves, the better. A counselor helps reveal cultural issues and teaches the couple how to compromise for each other.

Common Issues Addressed:

Pre-marital counseling addresses a wide range of topics:

  • Conflict Resolution – premarital counselors educate couples in resolving conflicts and how they can come to terms on issues they disagree on.
  • Finances – finance is a hot topic that couples should sit down on and learn how to navigate. The role of the counselor is not to act as a financial adviser – but to help each partner determine how they are going to create a financial system that will suit them both.
  • Sex and Intimacy – intimacy is what keeps partners close together. If uncomfortable discussing sex after being celibate, a counselor helps breaks the ice. Partners get to understand each other sexually and work towards maintaining a healthy relationship in the matrimonial bed.
  • Family – getting married sometimes includes starting a family together. Counselors direct the conversation in a serious light especially when it comes to the number of children and the aspect of timing.

Pre-Marital Counseling West Hempstead, NY

Adherence to privacy is what helps couples confide in their counselor. Be sure to work with Chana Pfeifer, your trusted therapist, providing exceptional skills and a supportive atmosphere for all couples in need of counseling services.

For additional information about attending, please call (516) 592-1107 or email Chana Pfeifer at TheHappierMe.LCSW@gmail.com.

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Pre-Marital Counseling Long Island

Pre-marital counseling Long Island, a form of couples’ therapy before getting married.

pre-marital counseling Long IslandOne of the most important choices a person makes in their life is choosing who to marry. This is because they’re choosing to live with their spouse in the same home and commit themselves to them, ideally for the rest of their life.

In today’s day and age, more and more couples are opting for pre-marital counseling so that they can ensure they and their future spouse are on the same page when it comes to what they expect from their marriage.

Also, it is easier for couples to talk about difficult issues in a safe environment where they are guided by a professional, as it helps them look at each other in a new light, with a new perspective.

For couples who have concerns about their upcoming marriage, or want to increase their compatibility, pre-marital counseling with Chana Pfeifer can be a very rewarding experience.

What issues do you talk about?

Getting married is a big decision, and pre-marital counseling can help partners get to know each other even better. Subjects such as finances, children and sexual relations can be areas where partners have differing views, and talking about them beforehand can help avoid major conflicts later on.

A good marriage counselor helps both parties improve their conflict resolution skills so that if the couple has any fights down the road, which is highly likely, they can sensibly know how to resolve them.

For couples who are looking for a good pre-marital counselor, Chana Pfeifer, based in the Long Island area, is one of the best in the profession and can help you deal with any concerns you may have.

How can it help me?

Pre-marital counseling can help partners talk about any concerns they may have about the marriage with each other so that they can resolve them before the actual wedding. It can also act as a method through which partners can talk about any old resentments or release the pent up aggression they may have. This way, both parties enter the marriage with a clean slate and old problems do not come back to haunt them.

Does it really work?

According to the results of a survey that were published in a notable psychology journal, couples who have some experience of pre-marital counseling or education have greater satisfaction with their marriage and have a 30% lower rate of divorce in the first five years. The reason for this is that when couples enter the marriage after prior training, they know what to expect, how to deal with their problems and their partner’s way of thinking, all of which contribute to a healthier relationship with fewer problems.

For additional information about counseling, please call (516) 592-1107 or email Chana Pfeifer at TheHappierMe.LCSW@gmail.com.

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What counts as infidelity?

Infidelity Counseling Long Island: What counts as infidelity?

Infidelity is becoming an alarmingly common problem with couples in various stages of their relationship.

infidelity counseling Long IslandInfidelity refers to the scenario in which one partner in a relationship breaks the promise to be faithful to the other. This problem must be dealt with as soon as it becomes apparent otherwise its negative influence can start to creep into various aspects of your life.

Due to changing family and social values, peoples’ lifestyles have changed dramatically too, and the increase in instances of infidelity is very strongly related to it. To get a sense of how rampant this problem is, a survey was carried out recently that showed while 90% of people in a relationship consider infidelity to be unacceptable, approximately 20% of partners engage in it at some time or another.

What counts as infidelity?

The definition of “infidelity” is literally “disloyalty,” but what counts as cheating in a relationship can vary from person to person. Women normally place a lot of emphasis on emotional attachment and attraction when defining disloyalty, whereas, for a lot of men, cheating encompasses physical relations with another.  This is why some people believe that infidelity only occurs when one partner has sex outside of the relationship while according to others, cyber or emotional affairs may also count as disloyalty.

Effects of infidelity.

From a psychological perspective, infidelity can have an extremely detrimental effect on the un-involved party’s psychological and emotional health. The faithful partner may experience signs of depression, low self-esteem, and even fits of rage. It can also have negative physiological effects on the loyal partner, such as lack of sleep, overeating, or under-eating.

Not only does infidelity impact the partners, but if they have children, they too can come in the middle of the problem and be exposed to negative stimuli. Infidelity can erode the foundation of various familial relationships and take a toll on the parties’ physical and emotional health. This is why infidelity is a multi-faceted problem, and couples must seek professional help as soon as they discover it.

Chana Pfeifer is an excellent marriage counselor who can help couples facing issues with cheating and disloyalty resolve those problems and find effective solutions.

How can you cope with infidelity?

While infidelity may severely damage a relationship, there is still a chance to salvage it with appropriate help and counseling. If both partners are willing to make an effort to solve their disputes, and the unfaithful partner is ready to make a change in their behavior, the probability of the relationship’s survival goes up.

While no one reason can account for a partner’s infidelity, often communication problems, dissatisfaction with the current relationship, and deeper psychological issues can be a triggering factor.

If your relationship is facing any issues such as disloyalty and cheating, Chana Pfeifer is a professional counselor who can help you work through the issues you’re facing and find a way to come out better at the end.

For additional information about counseling, please call (516) 592-1107 or email Chana Pfeifer at TheHappierMe.LCSW@gmail.com.

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10 ingredients of a connected relationship

1.     Connect with each other through touch to feel alive EVERY day.

2.     Be responsible to REMOVE your criticism, put-downs, blaming, shaming and negativity in your relationship space.

3.     Be aware of YOUR reactivity so you don’t vomit it into the relationship.

4.     Make a big deal about what you appreciate about your partner EVERY day.

5.     Make direct eye contact with each other for at least 10 seconds EVERY day.

6.     How can you self-soothe when you are frustrated, angry or negative?

7.     Show each other respect and hold yourself responsible for what you do.

8.     Have interests, hobbies and/or other relationships outside of your relationship, which creates a more whole person with interesting bits.

9.     Carve out time for your relationship as a couple.

10.  No one has the perfect romance like the movies and lives happily ever after.. and neither will you; it’s healthy to work on your relationship.

Awareness and communication are what makes a connected relationship work. If you feel you are having difficulty communicating with your partner, it would be beneficial to have a therapist guide you in the process. Sometimes couples become so emotionally disconnected and stuck in negative patterns that it is difficult to talk openly and honestly. If this feels like you, then reaching out to a professional social worker could be a great step toward having a connected relationship.

For any questions regarding relationship therapy as an individual or couple, feel free to email me or call me at (516) 592-1107.

Chana Pfeifer, LCSW, CIT

Counseling for couples and individual adults in a safe, supportive place.

Marriage Counseling Workshop August 2019

Give your relationship a gift with this marriage counseling workshop! Let’s enhance our marriages within our homes so we can merit to build the בית־נאמן.

August 4 & August 6
10 am – 4 pm

Machon Basya Rochel Simcha Hall
137 Lawrence Ave. Lawrence, NY 11559

Join us for a marriage counseling workshop that will include:

  • Tools to experience your spouse with healing, loving & empathetic exercises
  • Individualized attention
  • Hands on approach guided by excellent facilitators
  • Personal and completely confidential

Don’t wait to renew your love and your chemistry for one another!

Call or email today to reserve your spot:

Chana Pfeifer, LCSW, Certified Imago Therapist

(516) 592-1107
TheHappierMe.LCSW@gmail.com

$350 per couple. Lunch included.

Attending a marriage counseling workshop will reinforce your desire to remain committed to yourself, your family, or another person. It will show that you really want to learn how to reopen channels of communication.


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Discover strategies to overcome conflict and break through.
Identify your relationship’s specific strengths and how to build on them together.
Rekindle the love that’s been buried by the day-to-day struggles of life.

If your relationship is distressed, our Long Island marriage counseling workshop will provide you with a greater understanding of your relationship, a way to use your challenges as the opportunities they are for deeper connection, and a road map for repair.

Topics discussed in pre-marital counseling sessions:

Examples of some of the topics that are discussed during pre-marital counseling sessions include:

  • Finances
  • Parenting styles
  • Communication
  • Decision making
  • Roles in the marriage

(We’ll cover these and more in my pre-marital counseling sessions and workshops.)

Create mutual goals with your partner and resolutions for your marriage.

You and your partner may have different ideas of what specifically will mean you’ve achieved a happy and successful marriage. By discussing beforehand what you both hope to get out of your marriage, you can determine a few resolutions that combine what you both want. This gives you common goals to work toward that you both believe in.

Deal with conflict in a healthy way.

Even the happiest couples experience stress and conflict, and it’s essential to learn how to deal with these constructively as you prepare for the wedding and in the years to come.

Pre-marital counseling isn’t a compatibility test or a gauntlet to run.

It’s an educational process designed to support your relationship by providing the tools and coaching you’ll need to build a fulfilling life together in the years to come.

For more info. about pre-marital counseling, please call (516) 592-1107 or email Chana Pfeifer at TheHappierMe.LCSW@gmail.com

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The benefits of premarital counseling:

Premarital counseling is probably one of the farthest things from your minds. However, as the date draws nearer, you may begin to wonder how it could help strengthen your relationship with your significant other.

Premarital counseling is designed to set you up in the best positive way for marriage. It helps you and your partner address the areas that couples commonly struggle with. Many people assume counseling is for people that are in the midst of challenges. But premarital counseling is to help you avoid troubling times. That means, it’s a great fit for every engaged couple.

If toxic relationship patterns can be identified early and agreed upon, the process of real change can begin.
A motivated couple can begin to explore their problems from a new perspective and learn new ways to recognize and resolve conflicts as a result of the tools provided by the therapist.
Partners can begin to build trust and improve communication.
A counselor can provide “neutral territory” to help couples agree upon and work through tough issues with support.

For additional information on premarital counseling, please call (516) 592-1107 or email Chana Pfeifer at TheHappierMe.LCSW@gmail.com

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Offices in both Cedarhurst and West Hempstead:

422 Berrywood Court West Hempstead, NY 11552
222 Rockaway Avenue Building 1 Cedarhurst, NY 11516