Tag: Long Island social worker

What does emotional manipulation look like?

manipulation

Manipulation is when they blame you for your reaction to their toxic behavior, but never discuss their disrespect that triggered you.

When someone uses your emotions to get what they want, steer your behavior, or influence your ideals, it’s known as emotional manipulation.

Emotional manipulation can wear many faces. It can come in anger, disappointment, ridicule, or guilt. Gaslighting and love bombing are also forms of emotional manipulation.

Here’s emotional abuse tactics and what they may sound like:

  • Guilt: “If you loved me, you wouldn’t do that.”
  • Criticism: “You never do anything right.”
  • Isolation: “You’re picking your friends and family over me.”
  • Humiliation: “I’ll take you out to eat when you lose some weight.”
  • Threatening: “If you ever do that again, you’ll be sorry.”
  • Blaming: “Look what you made me do.”
  • Accusing: “I know you’re being unfaithful.”
  • Infidelity: “I could do better than you anytime I want.”

Emotional abuse leads to conditions such as:

  • low self-esteem
  • depression
  • anxiety
  • substance abuse
  • post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)

If you feel as though someone is manipulating your emotions, it’s OK to step away from the situation to gather your thoughts. Practice stating your own needs, desires, and boundaries clearly and without apology. The more comfortable you are with direct communication, the easier it is to spot manipulation from others.

Dealing with emotional manipulation is difficult because it can lead you to question yourself and your judgment.

When emotional abuse negatively impacts your life, consider seeking support & guidance from a MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONAL. Contact us.

A Grief Counselor To Help You Handle The Holidays With Ease

Complicated feelings typically arise during the holidays under any circumstance, but struggling with feelings of grief can make this time even more challenging. Grief counselor Chana Pfeifer, LCSW, can give you the support you need to get through the holidays with grace.

Holidays are difficult for people who’ve experienced the death of a loved one.

Any type of sound, sight and/or smell can trigger feelings of sadness, anger, emptiness, anxiety… the list goes on.

While you can’t change the situation for what it is, what you can control is your inner state of being. Does this mean not crying or feeling down? Of course not. Let yourself cry if you need it. Allow yourself to feel your feelings.

What you can control during times of grief is how you take care of your body & mind, so be realistic in your expectations during this time.

Grief can consume most of your physical and emotional energy no matter what the season. The holidays place additional demands and stress on your life. Respect what your body / mind is telling you. If you feel tired, take care of yourself as if you were physically sick. The mind and body work together.

It’s important to be aware of your limitations so you don’t overextend yourself, causing more stress. Consider changing your traditions to reduce stress. Limit social / family commitments to suit your available energy. Re-evaluate priorities and forego unnecessary activities and obligations. Keeping busy may distract you from your grief temporarily, but it may increase your stress too.

Handling the Holidays – Grief Counseling Services in Nassau County, New York.

There is no right way to move through this time of year, but it can be helpful to think about what values, traditions, and memories you want to share. Remember that grief has no expiration date— it is okay to feel how you feel.

Self-care and mindfulness are vital tools in navigating the holidays. Give yourself permission to rest. Allow feelings to come and go; the holidays don’t need to be perfect (they won’t be), so be gentle with yourself.

CHANA PFEIFER provides guidance & support so that you can find peace throughout the holiday season.

If you need someone to vent to with 100% confidentiality, or you would like help discovering coping strategies for dealing with the holidays, contact Chana Pfeifer, LCSW today. In-person and telehealth services available.

Chana Pfeifer, Long Island social worker, interviewed on Business Talk Radio

Chana Pfeifer, LCSW, interviewed on Business Talk Radio

Chana Pfeifer has been a therapist for over 24 years and specializes in relationships.

Her specific training is called Imago Relationship Therapy created by Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt. She ‘tripped’ over the approach when she was miserably married and going through 5 different couples’ therapists.

Below are a questions answered by Chana on Business Talk Radio:

Chana Pfeifer, LCSW, Long Island on Business Talk RadioHow has the COVID-19 pandemic affected your business?

I’ll confess.. I have hated Zoom in some ways. There’s nothing like an energetic exchange with a live person, but Zoom has allowed me to work through the pandemic. I’m teaching a college class to 7 girls via Zoom and I’m pleasantly surprised how well it’s going (from my perspective).

Us therapists are struggling with sitting with uncertainty & all the same issues our clients are suffering with.

Self care is REALLY hard during these times, and finding safe ways to take care of ourselves is essential.

Where do you see yourself in the near future?

One day I hope to resume my plans of doing premarital workshops so that we do a preventative work. For a drivers license, a person needs a written and practical test yet for a marriage, we just need a license. Most of us have not grown up in healthy relationships and I believe we can all use relationship training. I really believe this can prevent tremendous pain. I’m really grateful for what I’ve learned and how I can help people show up differently.

Chana sees adults live in her indoor / outdoor offices with social distancing, and also on Zoom & FaceTime.

Chana’s business locations are in Nassau County, NY
(two offices: one in West Hempstead & one in Cedarhurst, NY)

For more info. on counseling, call (516) 592-1107 or email Chana Pfeifer, LCSW today.

Social Worker Booking Information:

Accepted Insurance Plans: Aetna

Payments can be made via: Cash, Check, Zelle, Chase QuickPay, American Express, Discover, Mastercard, Visa, Health Savings Account