Manipulation is when they blame you for your reaction to their toxic behavior, but never discuss their disrespect that triggered you.
When someone uses your emotions to get what they want, steer your behavior, or influence your ideals, it’s known as emotional manipulation.
Emotional manipulation can wear many faces. It can come in anger, disappointment, ridicule, or guilt. Gaslighting and love bombing are also forms of emotional manipulation.
Here’s emotional abuse tactics and what they may sound like:
- Guilt: “If you loved me, you wouldn’t do that.”
- Criticism: “You never do anything right.”
- Isolation: “You’re picking your friends and family over me.”
- Humiliation: “I’ll take you out to eat when you lose some weight.”
- Threatening: “If you ever do that again, you’ll be sorry.”
- Blaming: “Look what you made me do.”
- Accusing: “I know you’re being unfaithful.”
- Infidelity: “I could do better than you anytime I want.”
Emotional abuse leads to conditions such as:
- low self-esteem
- depression
- anxiety
- substance abuse
- post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
If you feel as though someone is manipulating your emotions, it’s OK to step away from the situation to gather your thoughts. Practice stating your own needs, desires, and boundaries clearly and without apology. The more comfortable you are with direct communication, the easier it is to spot manipulation from others.
Dealing with emotional manipulation is difficult because it can lead you to question yourself and your judgment.